![]() My husband (who tends toward tidiness) has apologized to me (who tends toward messiness) on various occasions about a mess he’s made and plans to clean. ![]() Much of the time, they don’t even notice. Perhaps while they are relaxing, they allow their space to get slightly messy for a time, but it will not stay that way for long.įor those tending toward messiness, items out of place do not bother them. So it’s important to them to have a neat work and living space. When their space is cluttered, their minds feel cluttered. This is why they pick up and straighten items as they go. Items out of place are nagging eyesores to them – they feel distracted and uneasy. People who tend toward tidiness generally function in this way: When their space is tidy, they feel at peace, and can think straight. And this can lead to tension, conflict, resentment, hurt, or anger in the relationship. Sometimes two people in a relationship are quite similar in their need for tidiness, but most times each person in a couple will fall at a different place along the spectrum of tidy and messy. Several books and papers precariously piled up, dirty dishes accumulated in or near the sink, and mismatched socks left on the floor may be commonplace in their living space. Other marriages are made up of two generally messy people. Some marriages are made up of two generally tidy people.īooks alphabetized by author, clothes stored by color and type of fabric, and dishes and glasses neatly arranged may be the norm in their living space. Finding ways to appreciate the spouse who is neater or messier rather than convert them into another version of you.
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